Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Persuasive Essay



Jin Uk Kim    
Professor   M. Crane
English 1010
5 June 2012

Persuasive Essay
There are countless social media that make it possible to form broad connections between people. Since the function that people can interact online through social media, chat or share information with each other and the service they can receive by using it are very impressive, most of people have their own account for participating. As users of social media increase, there is a debate whether social media gives good influences to people or not. Although social media leads people to have more interaction and promotes long-distance relationships, it has a lot of bad things that make us out of control. Many of social media users are addicted and they became more isolated by using social media. The most famous social networks, YouTube, Facebook and Skype are included. It is important to know why people have to use social media carefully and need some restrictions when using it.
            Many people love social media because of its wide connectivity and functions that people can receive it for free; it does not require money to make an account and use it. Facebook is the most visible among various social media. First thing that people get impressed is, Facebook makes possible to create a deep networking between users. Since each user has a right to accept or refuse the friend request, the interest by people is high enough. Moreover people tend to allow the other’s friend request who have same thoughts and characteristics, by this reason it is able to maintain an intimate relationship. Not only users can leave comment on other's post and the other user reply to that comment, by doing this continuing communication can be accomplished. So, it is a same response of users that deep networking can be made naturally. The second benefit is, it is good in long distance relationship. The survey from the “Telegraph” which is a famous newspaper in United Kingdom, tells that Social networks such as Facebook are helping to inspire a boom in long distance relationships. The number of people who have a partner that lives more than two hours away increased about twice in the last 10years. Three quarters of them say that by using social network such as Facebook and MySpace where everything can be shared, they were able to maintain their long-distance relationship. In my case, I am not living with my family. I live in Utah and my family live in Korea. It is hard to contact each other and I cannot know what my family is doing their country and also they do not know what I am doing in this country. But after we started to use Skype, we can check each other what we daily do. If I want to see my family’s face, I can see by using videophone. Even though I and my family live far away about 5500miles, we can check each other’ status whenever we want because of development of social media.
            Even if Facebook and MySpace, those kinds of social media have various advantages, it receives less attention than the bad effects of social media. The most serious problem of social media is addiction. One reporter described that “Text messaging is no longer the biggest teenage obsession, and long gone are the days where the biggest worries for parents were celebrity crushes, massive phone bills from ridiculously long phone calls and chocolate overloads. These teenage obsessions still exist, but in today’s day and age, and in comparison to the Facebook craze, they seem rather insignificant (Director).” This huge issue also applied to me and my friends. When I came to Utah first, I had a hard time conversing with the people in this country. For learning English I decided to do Facebook rather than reading books or watching television, which is effective but not fun method. Because of Facebook’s worldwide connection, I was able to have more time and chance to communicate with my school friends. Soon, I could talk with Utah friends about private things and school work. As my relationship gets stronger, the time I spent doing Facebook extended, chat on-line and do applications already took a place in my life. I felt logging on Facebook was the best time ever in Utah since it helps me to learn language, to make friends, and to escape from boring life on abroad. But, the problem began with doing Facebook actively. My primary work of the day was doing Facebook. I preferred doing Facebook more than any other important work, including doing homework, exercising, sleeping, and even going to school. When I realized there was a problem, it was after I was addicted to Facebook. With my cousin’s help I could get away from Facebook, the dangerous social network. But some of my friends are still suffering from a Facebook with addiction.
            Another thing is that some person becomes lonelier after using social media. Most people might think that because social media have a benefit that give more opportunity to people to have more interactions through social network, people can strengthen relationship with their friends by chatting  and leaving comments on each other’s wall and even people could make new friends by online meeting. Opposed to their thoughts, it is not. According to interview with Dr. John Cacioppo, who is a professor in neuroscience at the University of Chicago, tells that ““You can end up online so much that you end up sacrificing face-to-face contact. Having 4000 friends on Facebook might make you feel that you have lots of friends, but you have no face-to-face contact. In that case, loneliness INCREASES (Johnson).” It is not possible to make real relationship if people do not meet face to face. The people who were not talkative and social would be worse. One of my friends could example of this. He was poor at interacting with friends, he could not participate in our conversation and if we initiated a conversation, he stepped behind and went to his place. After he started using social media, the number of interaction with friends decreased. And he even did not make new friends through social media and he became less social. It led him to feel more loneness and seriously he tried to suicide once. It was one of happening events around me result of using social media. It is a really serious problem in this society. It is related to human’s life.  This big problem is not facing to us.  
            In conclusion, although social media has lots of benefits that are attractive and helpful to us, it usually gives more harmful influences than good effects. Like an addiction and fraud advertising, it is not anymore a small problem that can be ignored. To make better future, it is really important to use social media carefully. All things are depended on you.  














References
Reporter, Telegraph. "Facebook Helps Promote Long-Distance Relationships." The Telegraph. UK News, 17 July 2008. Web. 5 Jun 2012. <http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/2420501/Facebook-helps-promote-long-distance-relationships.html>.
Director, Social Media. "Facebook Addiction Disorder- The 6Symptoms of F.A.D." Social Times. High 5 Games, 2 May 2011. Web. 5 Jun 2012. <http://socialtimes.com/facebook-addiction-disorder-the-6-symptoms-of-f-a-d_b60403>.
Johnson, Darko. "Can Facebook make lonely people even lonelier?." MixtheNet. Mixthenet, 2010. Web. 24 Jun 2012. <http://www.mixthenet.com/facebook-loneliness/>.

5 comments:

  1. Cool. I really like your personal experiences. Also, I like you explained what is good and bad to use social media. i think if you explain more about advertisment in social media, it would be better essay.

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  2. hey Jin ,i have gone through ur posted essay .this calls for appreciation ,i do agree with the statement of making advertisement ,making friends and connected with far flung frnds and family members ,apparently we need to use social media with great care ,dont be addictive .....Prashantstar20@gmail.com

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  3. I would add more voice. It seems kind of boring or uninteresting. An easy way to do this is add DRAPES (Dialogue, Rhetorical question, Analogy, Personal example, Example, Statistics). And NEVER use "In conclusion in your conclusion paragraph. Otherwise pretty informational.

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  4. I completely agree with you about careful use of social media, since nowadays it is popular to use it even in classroom! So students don't have any distractions from the Internet.
    Good post on social media tools in classroom: http://www.ninjaessays.com/blog/top-15-ninja-educative-social-media-tools/

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  5. You can also get good writing tips at http://www.theassignmentexperts.com/more.html

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